I’ve noticed something lately.

Maybe it’s because I talk to a lot of people every day. Maybe it’s because I pay attention more than people realize. Or maybe I’m noticing it because I feel it too.

Women are tired.

Not just I stayed up too late last night tired. It’s a different kind of tired.

Life feels like a lot lately. Everything costs more. Everything seems to take more effort. There’s always something happening, something needing attention, something we’re supposed to remember.

And maybe women have always been this tired. Maybe we just didn’t talk about it.

I look at my own life and I know I put a lot on my plate. I work. I have my dance groups and marching groups. Events. Costumes I’m building. Websites I’m playing with. Blogs I’m writing. Places I want to travel and things I want to experience.

And yes, a lot of that is by choice.

I LIKE my crazy little life.

But that doesn’t mean it isn’t exhausting sometimes.

And I know I’m not the only one.

I look at the women around me, and they’re doing just as much, sometimes more. Working, raising families, helping with grandchildren or parents, volunteering, keeping up with friends, organizations, appointments, birthdays and everything else life throws at us.

And somehow we keep moving.

We push. Then we push a little more.

I don’t know when we decided we had to do all of it. And not just do it…do it well.

Be good at your job. Be a good mother, wife, girlfriend, daughter, Mimi, friend, coworker. Be supportive. Be available. Remember everything. Check on everybody. Show up.

We become everybody’s counselor, nurse, cheerleader, problem solver, sounding board and emergency contact.

Then somebody asks:

“What are you doing for yourself?”

Well hell.

Let me check my calendar.

But underneath the humor, I do wonder when being busy became proof that we’re valuable.

Why does resting make so many of us feel guilty?

I’m guilty of it too. Give me a completely free evening and instead of thinking, Oh good, I can relax, my brain immediately starts making a list.

I could work on that costume. Write something. Finish that project. Plan another trip…

Apparently just sitting my ass on the couch is never the first suggestion.

But maybe it should be sometimes.

Because there are a lot of women walking around looking completely fine. Hair done. Makeup on. At work. At practice. At the meeting. At the event. Laughing and showing up.

And they’re tired.

That doesn’t mean they’re unhappy.

You can love your life and still be tired from living it.

You can love the people around you and still need five minutes where nobody needs anything from you.

You can love your hobbies and occasionally not want to touch them.

You can be grateful for everything you have and still admit that carrying all of it gets heavy sometimes.

Maybe that’s really all I’m trying to say.

We’re tired.

Not miserable. Not falling apart. Not necessarily unhappy with our lives.

Just tired.

I love my crazy little life. I love all the things I get myself involved in, and knowing me, I’ll probably find something else to add to it next week. 😂

But maybe I also need to learn that I don’t have to be doing something every single minute to make that life matter.

And maybe some of you need to hear that too.

We don’t always have to push.

Sometimes we can just be tired.

And sit our ass on the couch.